by Cyndy Edwards
mama maman madre moeder mam majka amámaji makuahine mutter mataji ahm mother mom
If there is a word that carries as much as much emotion as mother, I don’t know it. It’s a snowy May day and I’m up with sun thinking of the celebration of moms tomorrow. My thoughts drift to the mothers I know – friends, family, acquaintances. To how each and every one has had an impact on this world we share. How each and every one has taken on the lifelong caring role of another – or perhaps several others. Not all of our mother relationships are warm and wonderful. Sometimes they’re confusing or difficult or even scary. And they change.
Yes, most of us are aware of the variations that are part and parcel of any relationship that lasts over time. Mother-child relationships are the longest of all. For the mom who carries her child in her body, that relationship starts long before the infant is aware. It’s a relationship that’s tested over and over again. By events and choices and even the passage of time. Some of us get to experience the mixed blessing of becoming a mom to our mom. Some of us get to cherish our moms as we knew them in our hearts.
My mom died nearly twenty years ago. Of all the anniversaries associated with her life, it’s Mother’s Day that brings her most strongly to my mind. My first Mother’s Day without her, all I could think was how I no longer had a mom to celebrate. I no longer had a card to find or a gift to send or a phone call to make. It was a very sad day for me. Every year when Mother’s Day rolls back around, I think of others I know whose moms are with them only in their hearts and memories. But as in everything, if you let it, time is a great healer. I have learned that while I no longer have “my” mom’s presence on this earth, I know many mothers to celebrate. A bounty of women of many shapes and sizes and attitudes and insights.
I am thankful. Yes, I miss my mom. Because of her I know to be thankful for having women in my life who have given to me moments of reflection and challenge and joy. Women who have helped me to grow and heal and be. Women who I am pleased to call neighbor and family and friend.
May your Mother’s Day be filled with warmth and may you find the women in your life to celebrate.